The Double Life of Danny Day by Mike Thayer

Author:Mike Thayer
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Feiwel & Friends

CHAPTER 16

TEXCALIBUR

(Discard Tuesday—Sept. 21st)

The school bus doors thudded closed behind me, and I looked to see Zak saving me a spot in the last row, his eyes looking for all the world like it was his birthday and I was walking toward him with his cake, candles blazing. I shimmied down the aisle, dodging crumpled-up balls of paper and avoiding eye contact with Noah, who was busy gaming away on his phone. I might not like the kid, but you couldn’t doubt his dedication to video games.

“Okay,” Zak whispered as I took the seat next to him. “What day is it today?”

“It’s Tuesday, Zak,” I said blandly.

“You know what I mean,” Zak hissed.

“It’s a discard day.”

Zak sucked at his teeth. “Yeah, but how do I actually know for sure that this day I’m having right now is just going to disappear? It just feels like a regular day to me.”

I looked at Zak like he’d just insulted my mother. “What, you don’t trust me?”

“C’mon, man, this is a pretty new concept for me. A little bit of assurance would go a long way.”

I sat and thought a moment. I’d never had to convince anyone that they were actually living a discard day before. After a minute or so I got an idea. I stood up and cleared my throat. “Attention, all fellow bus riders. My name is Danny Day, and I have a very bad case of explosive diarrhea. That is all.”

I sat back down with a smug look not befitting someone who had just announced to fifty kids that he had severe digestive problems. For a moment, Zak looked like he was going to switch seats, but he just shook his head and laughed. “Weeeellll, I will admit that that is slightly out of character for you.”

“Slightly?” I said, knowing that no matter how many discard days I spent with Zak he would only ever have my sticky-day behavior as a reference.

“Okay, fine,” Zak conceded. “I will admit that I did not see that one coming. So if it truly is the discard day, then what do you have planned so far?”

“Zak,” I said blandly. “I don’t know what’s going to happen any more than you do. Most of the time, discard days are for seeing what goes on, taking notes, and lots of knee-jerk reactions. Or I just play video games.”

Zak rolled his eyes. “Yeah, you’ve mentioned that once or twice. So is that it? You take Noah down by just playing a bunch of video games and then coming out of the blue one sticky day and taking it to him?”

I eyed Noah as he pumped his fist in the air, stood up, and yelled something to the kid in front of him. Gloating, raging gamers like Noah annoyed me to no end. “No, it needs to be bigger than that. I’ve played with kids like this before. The moment things don’t go their way, they start making excuses about how they were lagging, or they weren’t

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